Me: “My Lord Eligos, please come…”
Eligos: “I am here. We spoke briefly last night when I told you to take the night off. You were tired and frequently are. Do you remember?”
M: “I do. You reminded me that I have my hands in a lot of pots and those pots all take energy, even if I’m not actively engaged.”
E: “Yes, that is true (and remembered correctly). And what else?”
M: “I asked if I should’ve been less engaged. I did see the various campaigns I have going on right now and some other longer-term workings I renew here-and-there. I asked if I had made some sort of mistake, based on Ego, for having started some and for continuing them.”
E: “And what did I say?”
M: “You said I typically take on things I’ve been told or nudged to do. THen you reminded me of a reading I got from a friend not long ago that had confirmed that I was being nudged when I wondered why I kept going back to some campaigns I had started a while ago. Two years or more in some cases.”
E: “Yes, I did. And my prompts is why you remembered more of it that the few minutes ago when you were trying to think about it. It (the ‘conversations’) are stored there. Some are just more apparent and on the surface.”
M: “Thank you. Is there something else I should be asking at the moment?”
E: “You have so many grimoires going right now. You’ve noticed that the information and work usually ebbs and flows within those sets of work (amount of work per grimorie at any given time balances, roughly).”
M: “Yes. I am trying, but dependent on some work I’d like to see to bring a few to publication right now.”
E: “I’m not criticizing your work volumes, flow, or motivation. Merely saying that we do try to keep it tolerable. You are concerned with burnout and with putting out works below your standards for expediency due to the work level you currently have, yes?”
(Of course he knew the answer)
E: “And you’re being saddled with more work. Can you handle it?”
M: “I hope so and I hope it wouldn’t be given without that being the case.” (He paused for a moment)
E: “It isn’t always and that’s what you’re really concerned with, this other stuff aside. You understand that right, left, or center, magicians can become food if they are not looked after – and do not look after themselves.” (I nodded)
E: “You’ve recently had a few relationships go sour on you.”
(This was true and I hadn’t said anything. A relationship with an entity I’ve cultivated daily (mostly) for a year has abruptly become strange. The ‘care’ and ‘concern’ isn’t as present and the interactions are unusually strained. This is, in part, taking the side of a friend who also works with this entity and has stopped because they haven’t gotten the same interactions or results that I have. I took the side of my friend in that I said I would do the same if I were in her situation. This was then pushed to a ‘do you agree or not? Yes or no. No caveats’. Naturally, I said yes.
But the whole thing has a weird feel to it. the entities haven’t changed. Some are obviously still sympathetic and caring, but are being muted about it, and none of that makes sense when I know the entities haven’t changed.)
E: “Yes, it is related. You’ve been told to reduce or stop offerings and some of the daily work, too, for that current. I think you should. You know you don’t want to, but other growth has to happen sooner than later.”
(He can tell this makes my heart a bit heavy. This wasn’t *just* a year, it was literally a year and a half of dedicated, daily workings and offerings, only taking a day or two off for illness, circumstance (like moving) and making those up when I could. This isn’t the daily work, which has also been done about 5 times a week for a year)
E: “You’re right to remember that I am also about conflict resolution. Let’s not let this have to devolve into harsh rejection. She will call you back to service when the time is right.”
(I knew he was right. I walked over to her idol, bowed, felt a sort of ‘kiss’ on the center of my head, and resigned myself to the discomfort of the disruption of an established routine)
E: “Good. There you go. And thank you for trusting me with that. You know what to do. We will tell you when.”
I nodded and he left. Thank you, Eligos.
Some history – I typically call on Eligos during my campaigns to help sound the notifications for complex, multi-faceted targets and situations. He seems quite willing to perform this capacity for me and I’m quite grateful for that. Do I know exactly what he does? He helps with coordination and more effective usage of resources towards specific goals I have in mind where I’ve set the intent for X to happen, but (likely) not the specific mechanism. For example, I may ask that troops in a certain area be delayed or have a reduced fighting capacity to favor my goals and what I think should happen. From his vantage point and knowledge, he can help direct some of the specific tasks to be done to better enhance the work. What he’s showing me in my mind right now it an example of him directing smaller (or larger) units to affect something slightly differently for a better return on their efforts and for the intent/goal they are supporting. Some tasks are overseen directly by the spirits, but many are delegated and this provides the opportunity for them to learn and grow from a different, higher order spirit than the one they may serve.
Dreamwork
Haven’t been remembering my dreams lately for several nights now, so I will update this when/if I do.
There’s no sense in sugar-coating the experience. I was sitting under the covers with a former coworker dressed only in her panties and a tshirt. Don’t get me wrong, she’s cute and all that and I can still feel her skin under my hand in part of it. She was missing some of her tattoos and I don’t know what those are, only that she has them. And this was perfectly acceptable behavior for what was going to happen later (which didn’t).
The awkward part was that my wife was sweeping the floor in some house I don’t recognize, knew I was in the next room, and didn’t care. I probably don’t need to say that this was awkward, but it was really damn awkward. Especially since I would slip in and out of different views (1st, 3rd), to keep abreast (couldn’t help it) of the situation. The glaring “OK”ness of this was the most conflicting thing of all – even during the dream.
This…would never happen. I have had similar scenarios happen in the past in dreams. One was with a very good friend of mine, which is what made it even more perplexing. In these dreams, it’s the lack of conflict that leaves it more uncomfortable after one wakes up and reflects. In none of these cases, would I ever see that happening. The friendships and/or working relationships aren’t seen in those ways in the here-and-now.
There are some oddities that comes from some of these dreams, though. In one case, I saw a hair style I didn’t know about and found out it is natural for them about a year later. In last night’s near-adventure, her breast size was specifically noticable several times as part of raising my discomfort and, frankly, I couldn’t tell you about them IRL. Obviously not something I’m going to ask about and I really doubt I will ever see this person again. Different timezones, different friend groups (I actually don’t care for many of those I know about – they’re annoying as shit), very different age ranges. And we’re both married, which is definitely nails in both our coffins.
Not sure why this dream happened, but I could feel Eligos behind it and am recording because of this.
Freewrite
This is supposed to be 5 questions that you should get some answers for/to by the end of the week. Since Eligos is largely based on conflict resolution with this book and I am now in a new position, then it would make sense to ask questions about that.
Who at work is someone I should look out for (future conflict, sinister intent)? Which areas should I focus on more with learning the role?
What related skills should I take on to be more efficient (not directly related)? Can I get clarity when listening to the feedback session on Monday to apply it properly?
Is there anything else I should be aware of as I moved forward with this role?
I will update any answers I get as best I can. I’m getting inklings of them as I typed, but that could just be me projecting what I expect and not what is real.
aaaaa
The two invocations are supposed to be having Eligos assist make a divination more effective, which I’m no going to do. Anybody that has 5 problems from earlier this week, a problem/conflict to be discovered in dreaming (or similar), and two more problems that require divination seems like an awful lot of problems. I also don’t have a preferred method of divination to apply against problems that don’t seem suitable for divination. I do have two problems – my vehicles (1 in Hawaii, 1 still in Maryland), but those aren’t really suitable for divination. Following the procedures and greasing with some magic as needed should solve those.
What am I going to do? Well, I’m going to invoke him and get messages I need to her from him that I may not know I need. If they aren’t TOO personal, they’ll stay in here. Cake.
(He wanted a drink of alcohol through me – I offered)
E: “Do you know why I have the head of a camel in some pictures?” (I said no) “Because I can adapt and preserve in harsh places. Not only persevere, but THRIVE”
(Another sip)
E: “Do you know why I’m on a flying (beast) on that card?”
M: “Vantage point.”
E: “Yes, you hit that one on the head. I have a higher vantage point than most. And you vantage point has a tendency to be too far forward and not enough on the NOW.” (fair enough)
(Another sip)
E: “Do you know why you have such trouble with some other magicians?”
M: (oh boy) “No, but can guess.”
E: “Because you fail to see their point of view and the necessity of their practice. For them, not for you. Yours is quite good for where you’ve come from (how I started, etc…). I will also say this…if you continue to try to reconcile with their points of view, it will only get you so far. Your practice is different, doesn’t need the same things theirs does, and would do you a disservice.”
M: “Okay, why would that be a disservice?”
E: “Because you’d waste time and energy on things you won’t likely need, instead of what you will need for your next level of advancement – not theirs.”
M: “Thank you.”
E: “One more thing. You recognized the call to look elsewhere for your fox material. You will find it, but not likely right away. Research, but don’t force. The timing isn’t right and when it is, the current will (re)open for you.” (He left)
M: “Thank you, Eligos.”
aaaaa
I am wiped. I tripped over to Ford Island again today and then you can’t park in the area I needed to go to, so I grabbed my bag and everything I needed for it and found my way over to that puffer fish to grab some of those spines which was still there. I was afraid it wouldn’t be after what…two weeks?
It may not be as hard as it is in Maryland right now but the sun feels so much closer here in Hawaii and we had noticed that the last time we were here. After 2 weeks the spines of the puffer fish had been distributed and had also had rocks pushed on top of some of them due to the tides. I dug those out and grabbed a couple of extra pieces, but the majority of the fish was gone outside of the spines. Thankfully I was quite please to have even this many spines but I had greatly underestimated their number.
I was so excited between that and several pieces of driftwood there were about as long as my car that I did a live feed on Instagram I just really couldn’t help myself. But even then I didn’t realize how many of those puffer fish spines that I had collected. I think the most side collected in a bunch was four.
I used the shop sink in our garage because I can smell the still rotting flesh from some of the fish on some of these spines. It was going to flood the garage and I’m grateful that it’s largely empty at the moment but that won’t be the case once our stuff gets here from Maryland. So I grabbed some dish soap and a little scrubber brush that’s about the same size as a toothbrush but much stiffer and I start scrubbing. Some of these spines are several inches long, but the majority of them would fit inside of a quarter or a half dollar. What this means practically is that there are a shit ton of the spines and I can’t let the drain out of the sink until I have cleared all of these spines out of it because they will go down the drain and then I will have a larger problem of a clogged drain that I can’t just run some cleaner through because it will dissolve the pipes before it will likely dissolve the spines. And we don’t own this place.
I can’t remember exactly when I started but it was at least three to four hours of scrubbing. I was also supposed to make dinner tonight and that was a little bit delayed because of this. Between the heat of the Sun, the mile plus walk to get to the spine area, 3 to 4 hours of scrubbing in a garage with no ventilation, … I was pretty damn tired when I got ready to make dinner.
during the scrubbing process I’d realized that tonight was Sunday and that is my traditional day for doing my Zhao Gongming offerings. He was a bit amused and gave me a pass. So when I finally got done making dinner and then eating my own after everyone else (due to the dinner), I came down into my room to rest.
and that’s when I was gently reminded that I had forgotten to do my work with Eligos today! I went to crawl out of bed, which is really an air mattress that’s only 8 inches off the floor (if that), and if all day gentle metaphysical push on my chest to stay still. While I was making dinner a friend of mine had contacted me about her problem I’ve done some work to help with not too long ago. I’ve been told that several members of her family were trying to interfere with the working is to both she and I had done that were designed to help her get into the schools that she desired to. There have been plenty of signs of success – entities had stepped forward to help, signs continued, yet now, at the time of admissions acceptance, there are issues with their family accepting their decisions.
Eligos is now going to help resolve that conflict on my behalf. He’s also using that as our last interaction together with regards to the 76th Week Goetia. This was an unexpected very generous gift but I am quite grateful for.
Hail Eligos! And thank you.
