Last night, I saw an option on Amazon Music that wasn’t there in the past and this was enough that I purchased three albums I already had. The problem was that I had them in physical copies, digital wasn’t an option the last few times I looked, but now they were. And what were they?
The original song I used to sing to Hecate, as best I could, both in voice and intent when I started my path down this path ten miles from where I currently live. My mood was foul this morning, from yesterday’s issues and I asked to wait until this afternoon.
It was a nice near- deja vu moment when I was driving down Kunia Road, listening to the very song I sung to Hecate. I still remember how scared I was, being so far outside my comfort zone. SO Scared… Which seems to amusing now, but I remember how serious it was to me. And it WAS serious, looking back. Just not in the ways I imagined. Would she smite me for messing up too much? Was there an acceptable range for matching the song as I drove in morning traffic? How many notes could I miss before my car caught fire and I died a horrible death?
Okay, not really the last few, but you know. I was scared. And what had me more scared? Dying by a Goddess that also had *something* to do with necromancy or ghosts or shades or whatever the hell that stuff was. I’d died many times and had faced death many times living outside the wire in Iraq and going on patrols daily. But this was a Goddess that, supposedly, could snatch me and fuck my shit up once I was dead. Dying’s one thing. Done it. Faced it lots of ways.
But…she wasn’t going anywhere and THAT disturbed me the most.
Driving down that road, when I would sing either way, but mainly up, was a bit surreal. I didn’t expect to come back to Hawaii. Didn’t expect to be singing a song only available on CD with her in my presence. Yet, there I was, driving down Kunia Road, singing to her again, like my younger magician self, knowing it’s good enough and remembering all of those times I was so scared it wasn’t.
Lovely memory.
