Marax: “Why do you not have the incense ready? You know what I want.”
(I had only called his enn a few times when this happened. I typically give it at the end and he knows this.)
Me: “I haven’t finished the calling yet and spoken with you.”
Ma: “You are speaking with me now.”
(He left, but didn’t leave fully. I could feel him near the space still)
I continued to call his enn until I felt it thickening in the area. The reason is that this is the meditation day and I wanted his energies in the room to bring out my observations more fully, since I was already noticing some when drawing the sigil.
Meditation:
There are some immediate things that come to mind when using this sigil. The given one in the book is similar to the standard one you find on the internet at large. At the right side, it looks more like the stick figure’s feet are similar to a cloud. There are several patches of three round objects and whether those are berries, stones, or similar is anyone’s guess.
I’ve called Marax in the past, but he didn’t come with this attitude. He could be playing up the stern behavior warning Connolly puts in there and seeing how I react to it. I’m less inclined to delve much deeper into the sigil, but there are a few mor things I noticed.
One of the arms is down past the legs and holding something or is potentially bound there. While the one bunch is clearly in the hand, the other seems to be atop or attached to this bound arm. Maybe he can’t hold all four, so it must be attached or worn? The bunches are also different. The one extending from the hand seems more held and the one on the arms seems more balanced, given the spacing differences between the two.
Freewrite:
Marax: “You are smart, even ‘clever’ at times, but you lack the discipline to stay on any single task for a prolonged period of time. Sure, when you only have to do a little bit each day, you’re good. But longer endeavors – no, you lack sustainability. You disagree.”
Me: “I do. The time frames we’re thinking of are NOT the same. A small time to you could be a microsecond, a month, a year, ten years… It is an unfair assessment when I have years worth of daily work that had to be done…. -“
M: “- and you concentrated and suffered every minute, did you? Y-” (I raised my finger, since he started speaking as soon as I had typed ‘Me’ below)
Me: “I’ve done several, roughly a half-dozen, series of progressive paths that required daily work that I did often without wanting to or understanding, just to see if they were worth it over the years and what I seem to be getting is a lecture on the inability to maintain discipline.
My workings aren’t the “we need to wait for the right timing” excuse that most other make to justify their inability to gather enough power when the moments aren’t ‘ideal’ to get the work through to manifestation. I won’t say I work all the time, as that is counterproductive. But what I’m hearing is that I’m being lectured for things I’ve proven false in ACTION. This seems to be a waste of my time to get lectured on.”
(There was a silence and then it occurred to me that this exact behavior is what he was wanting me to document. All of it is true. 9+ months for Helios Unbound while I was moving. Some weeks missing here and there for the 76WG, but not two. Working the nearly year-long path through the Shadownomicon. The 5 months of the Kasdeya.
And so it’s been documented. If I look at it selfishly, what does that gain me – this documenting? It’s already been publicly documented on sites that I mostly DON’T control and don’t visit anymore.
This is another confrontational approach with Marax that I wasn’t expecting based on past experience. COuld be the difference in the sigil brings a different aspect, but there’s something at play here. But the 76WG is, brutally or not, supposed to benefit me and I don’t see how these two entries have thus far.
Invocation/Evocation 1 – Scrying
I see a lady on a prairie. Looks to be early Americas, maybe mid-19th – certainly not the 20th century. She’s standing there holding the plant with a fuzzy top similar to a cattail but it’s dry and growing on a grasslands plain. She stops and looks to her right somewhere in the distance, a place I can’t see. Then the view turns and I see somebody coming in on horse-drawn carriage down the dusty road not going very fast. It seems to be a passenger carriage, not just somebody hauling something to market. In this carriage is a woman I don’t see but I believe is her mother. When I finally do see her come out the young woman is overjoyed and starts running towards her. The young mother is wearing a purple dress and her presumed mother is wearing some sort of light magenta or a darker pink. They embrace at that point the stagecoach turns the carriage away and it starts going on but I don’t feel like there’s a house that’s within a quarter mile.
Inside the house are children doing the chores. A tweenage daughter looks to be doing the dishes. Two younger brothers in pants and suspenders are doing things like sweeping and putting things away. Sounds like it’s quite a raucous event and the girl has to keep reminding them to stay on task. I believe the oldest is 4 years younger than she is.
The mother and the young woman come in. They’re inviting and it’s very clear that the mother does not want to get her white gloves dirty and I didn’t notice the gloves when she came out of the stagecoach. She’s looking around and not wanting to touch anything, not wanting to sit anywhere she might get her dress dirty, and this offends the young woman. She’s a little hurt by this tries to make the best of it. Eventually the mother decides that she can sit on a bench out on the porch, but doesn’t want to sit inside the house (and she doesn’t feel welcome there for her own personal reasons). This strains the relationship and colors the events from then on, but I can’t see them. The image of swirling in my head and I am pulled back.
Marax was waiting for my reaction to this, but didn’t really seem to want to elaborate. He’s hovering and seems like he wants to talk about it, but doesn’t say anything. No idea. Strange entry.
With the Second evocation\invocation, it wasn’t quite what I expected. It wasn’t going to happen. I had to get my son from school at 3pm, drive the 45-60 minutes home, and had a going away party at 6pm. But it was Friday and I get off early to exercise. So, I went for a quick “jog” and was ready a little before 6 to go. And Marax said I had done what he wanted me to do and considered that my second evocation/invocation. Works for me.
I did get a ritual from him today that anyone can do. Doesn’t take any particular skills outside of visualization – and a little discipline.
Ritual:
(His words)
Chant my enn 108 times while successfully doing a successful behavior (in your mind) Longer chant times can help.
For best results, fully engulf yourself as much as possible in seeing it. The immersion is more important than the number, but more with immersion is better.
Hail Marax!
